Andrew

"It's simple," again, and there is no following
any steps on that guitar, echoing
through red bricks which breathe
secrets, I think history has a voice
too, unlike me who feels that
I've lost it beneath the constant
cascade of your thoughts, this is all you do
with a brain, don't say it, you won't you're
well aware that I have been chewing
my lips and boba to avoid my opinions,
I disagree with your reality and you
with mine, sixteen, sixteen you probably
were tearing up the world, driving
fast cars, I'll admit it honestly my heart
fluttered, but I feel misunderstood, even
after the soft, warm embodiment of embrace,
when your misty jade green eyes fill
with something I am learning to
realize, I'm not giving in to you
only a foolish girl would stay in this place,
for you won't change and neither
will I abandon what I believe, perhaps
I am choosing the quiet journey but
it is so very lovely, the purity of
curling up in a feeling, lost in the ocean
of knowing that I can be without
words, and I feel my heartbeat in the
silence, closing my eyes,
it's somehow beautiful to be at ease
when I see him, sweet and unassuming,
I'm not convincing myself, I'm not following anything,
I just know it.

Once a year, I do something impulsive. This was that day. Mixed feelings. I can't condense the words into proper poem. It's just this for now, I might edit later.