Mornings Thereafter

On this in-between morning
Of sunlight and gray haze,
If I could find a quiet wall
To scream my thoughts into,
I would declare my confusion
And in-between feelings
For you,
And the memories of your body
My face pressed hard against
Burning skin, hot tears
Streaming down my face,
Please
Don't reject me.

-A.K.-

Old Storms

I realized I haven't seen her in a year
Like lightning at night
Striking a dormant chord inside
Every glance behind
Reminding me that I told you so
Do I miss her?
How can I be sure about it when the
Very sight of her
Body moving, figure all the same
Lithe and swirling
Makes me burn with confliction
Nothing Latin about
The dancing couplets yet I have seen
Hands like lovers
And those hands will never touch me
You don't look tortured
But of course, I never appeared scared
Of the story's ending
And I won't call this a new start for
This is just the burnout
Engine, towed home by a realist, begging
Behind the wheel
For me to shut up, calm down, return
To a time gone by,
Lost in the blur of memories, before her,
Hear now, the rain comes.

-A.K.-

Casual Embrace

You are just a chance-defying wonder,
Drowning, so strongly weighted
That I am breathless,
Don't you realize when you go
How it renders my insides,
Mess of my own making
Craving
Your presence worse
Than the last raspberry, given
Four years gone,
I wouldn't have taken a bite
Of this poison, addictive passion
To a pretty mouth,
I never even believed,
That words can sum up calculations
Which don't exist in any way,
Shape, form, but two shoulders and tears,
And too many eyes
Flickering, like car lights
On a June night,
I can always tell every time you travel
By your scent, it lingers
A kind of simple subtlety
Which will not let me
Escape this deep resounding echo
Your voice on my mind
Never meant to stir up trouble,
Yet the gauntlet exists, words twist
In useless misery,
Felled by my new mistakes,
My dearest friend, this chest spilling over
With affections untamed,
Has found no peace nor solitude
In your casual embrace.

-A.K.-

Wounds

If vampires existed this would be
close to criminality, you
don't know the difference between
this and that, don't try
to convince me otherwise,
You're a child with wounds
and all I want is to hear you admit
"It hurts," don't belong to such abuse
Kylie Jenner's home-made lips
caused everyone to cringe, so
why do they think this is alright?
Making claims, property and passion,
I've never seen a love so raw
since 50 Shades left a glaring imprint
on a boy's neck,
Six lights go on in my head,
somebody stop
lying to you, whispering through
purple teethmarks,
Blood and bruises, words are useless,
"Just couldn't resist this,"
So right about now you're savoring the pain.

-A.K.

Remind Me

I swore that all I'd ever see was a dusky sky
Filling with stars on a runway from here
But he looks so good this summer evening
What I'd give, I don't know, for him to be with me

I'm a writer, but my words are useless
To fight off the suffocation inside, all I sense
Are his gentle fingertips, cotton t-shirt
Head against his chest, timing his heartbeat,

Just who am I supposed to be, remind me
When he's got his arms around my waist, warm
Like sunlight I've been needing, I'm just desperate
To have a man love me, that's it, isn't it?

It must be true that people spread their self-hatred
The disease of your eyes and your skin and I,
I never felt this way about you before tonight
Drown me in some other place, far away from you.

-A.K.-

Guilt

David was a rotting sinner
Whose wrongs go through minds
Like handfulls of water, we
Don't realize who he was but
We know you, like tears
You've spilt every night, "God
why, I never meant to get
this close to damned,"
But you're still condemned, if
You don't crawl out of bed
Each morning and kiss the
Languid sun, and it sustains you
No more than the love of a liar
There is no warmth
Inside your den of guilt,
And you stopped questioning excuses
Long before you started making them.

Incheon Sunrises

Incheon has sunrises like a smokey room
Filled with warm air so wet you are
Too hot when your eyes blink open,
And the gray light seeps in
A suffocating dawn where you
Lie still, breathing shallow,
Sweat pooling in the shadowed
Crevices of your neck, your chest
Rising and falling and sticking to a gray wife-beater
But you'd never hit a girl,
You'd never touch one and neither
Do you think of them much anymore
Your hands ache with the memories
The silent stories of what you have held
And what has been taken away
The clock ticks, you bite the skin
Of your dry lips, salty and
Your eyes trace the journeys of each crack
On the ceiling
Reflecting the travels of a body
Through this, your changing world
The prayer beads on your
Wrist leave round red dots
In your flesh but
The flesh doesn't understand
How your mind rejects that faith
Like a poison in your
Very bones crying at the thought
Of people suffering, so you turn away
But when your being tremors
In stiff rejection, you whisper,
"Who am I?"
This is the way that Incheon mornings unfold,
Filling your room with empty wet smoke.