Fear

 (Note: This is written from the perspective of my character Park ChunHee from my recently named story The Summer Colors of You, and has nothing to do with my own state of being. In other words, I'm not depressed or suicidal. This is for character development...and I felt like writing something from his perspective. ^^)

Fear


It's so white and gray and cold in this place
I stopped feeling anything long ago
This apathy has overcome me
Yet I'm consumed deep within by anger

Perfect is so short a moment
We can't live it very long, before it burns out
The time becomes ash, floating off in the wind
Like the sparks that ignite and disappear into the night

Certainly my path grew wide open and unreliable
My heart faltered and my hands shook with pain
Things I thought I would never endure, I survived
I survived, and I breath in this moment

My tears are a sign that I'm still here
An aching reminder of my human imperfection
A failure I became in the moments of darkness
Soon to disappear like everyone else has

I'm going to die tonight, and it hurts
It hurts so much as I feel tears begin to fall from
My tired, blood-shot eyes, endlessly searching
For something to cling on to, I grasp wildly

I'm angry, and I'm hurt, and I don't know what I want
They've all thrown me away; they called me worthless
I'm an idiot who can't learn anything and doesn't speak to you
Because I hate this place and I hate these people

I hate everything; people, places, words
If I could escape everything, it might be peaceful
But I'm afraid to disappear forever
I'm afraid.






 Thanks for reading,

-Argentia